Wishing everyone a sweet year ahead is a beautiful concept — whether it’s New Year’s in January or during Rosh Hashanah, which just recently passed.
Last year, my goal on Rosh Hashanah was to cast away what I thought was the biggest sin of all — mistreating myself. My goal last year was to purge myself of the fears that came with doctor appointments and medical concerns.
But in creating these goals, I made a misstep. I went to doctor appointments expecting to have conquered all my fears. I was resolved not to show doctors my human side. In the end, at a recent oncology appointment, I couldn’t attain an unreachable goal: showing my game face. And even worse than that, I beat myself up after the appointment for being human in front of my doctor.
I mistreated myself for not being a better person. And then I berated myself for mistreating myself.
My goal over next year is simple, but not easy: to accept and, dare I say it, embrace my humanness. So this year, I’m on a different path, stepping back so I can step forward.
Tags: doctors, fear of doctors, game face, New Year, Rosh Hashanah